by Guest Thu Dec 06, 2012 3:15 am
John was trying so hard not to lose his temper with this man. He had no idea how uncomfortable he was making John, he wasn't being infuriating on purpose, it would be incredibly rude to tell him to get the fuck out. This was however, exactly what John wanted to do, because he needed to get back to touching Sherlock as soon as possible or he felt like he might explode.
"We're both fine, thank you for your concern. He's always like this, restless sleeper," the conductor blushed when he picked up on the implication of John's words, "I didn't realize I looked discomposed. I had a frustrating conversation with my work partner, it must have affected me more than I realized."
"Ahh," the conductor said knowingly, "now tha' I can sympatize wiv. Jus last Monday I was talkin wiv Old Jack 'oo works on the--"
Sherlock starts tossing about on the seat and nearly falls off. John quickly leans over to put a hand to keep him on the seat.
"I'm sorry, I should wake him. You probably want to go, he's a complete ass when he gets woken up."
"Oh, yea', know whachoo mean. Me wife'll bite your 'ead clean off if you try'n talk to 'er before she as her coffee in the mornin."
The man continues to start telling a story about his wife. Sherlock flails out with his leg and kicks the conductor in the shin, and he finally leaves.
As soon as the door is closed, John is lunging over to Sherlock and pulling him up to a sitting position. He has a tight grip on Sherlock's hips and pulls them close as he starts kissing Sherlock desperately.
"I can't believe you kicked him."
"Emergency situation. Only way to get him to shut up and leave."
John pulled at buttons and pushed Sherlock so he was leaning back on the seat with his hips forward. He draped himself so he could reach Sherlock's nipples under his open shirt, then latched on, sucking at one and twisting the other with his fingers. When Sherlock starts tugging at John, he begins to place soft kisses randomly on Sherlock's chest and stomach and--
Fumbling at the door.
Again, John flies off of Sherlock, quickly throwing his coat over Sherlock to cover his bare chest.
"Back to sleep!"
He sits down and (very painfully) crosses his legs and leans against the window.
The door opens and a man stumbles in, reeking of alcohol. He collapses in the seat next to John and leans against him.
"Edith! OO cut your 'air! Why di'ju do tha? Tha'a new *hic* shirt? The train as a bar? Di'ju know that? Issa good thing. Nos-scared we're going t' crash now."
John tries to push the man off.
"Sir, you're in the wrong cabin. I am not your wife. Please leave."
"Bloody 'ell, you're a man!"
"Yes, I am, now if you would please--"
"Where the hell is my wife?!!"
John closes his eyes tightly.
"Most likely at your seat, sir. It appears you had a small mix up and came to the wrong one."
"Well shit. I tho' this was my seat..." the man looks completely clueless.
"Do you have your ticket on you?" John asks, sighing, used to dealing with Harry like this, "Check your pockets."
The man does so, pulls out a ticket, and squints at it.
"...Can't read it. Little squiggles keep changing."
John takes the ticket and reads it. He stands up and tries to adjust his clothes to make his erection less noticeable.
"Come on, it's just down the hall, let me take you."